(no subject)

[darchildre]

Granny died yesterday, a few hours after my last post. She went very peacefully, and my mom and I were able to wash and dress her before the hospice workers came to take her to the funeral home.

God, dealing with death is weird. I spent most of the day thinking, "Is it all right that I'm doing this now?" Is it okay that I was just about to eat lunch when she went, and so I did a little while afterwards? Is it okay that I needed to do laundry today, so I'm still doing it? How much noise can I make - do I need to be quiet? We all three of us immediately felt like we needed to be as quiet as possible, out of respect somehow. Extremely weird.

I'm sad and I miss her, but mostly I'm happy and relieved for her. She's not in pain anymore and she believed strongly that, after her death, she'd be reunited with her mother and the rest of her family. I'm sure her ancestors have welcomed her in. We spent the rest of the day swapping pictures and stories of her, and had a zoom call with my sisters so they could do the same. We spent most of the zoom call laughing, which I think would have made her happy.

She's being cremated and we're not having a funeral - she didn't want one. Apparently, there's a process where you can have a person's ashes made somehow into small stones, which we are doing and which I find rather lovely. Some of the stones will go to her daughters and grandchildren, if they want them, and my dad is building a wooden box for the rest. When we're able to, we'll fly with the box to New Bedford and bury it by Granny's mother.

She was a sweet, funny, infuriating, tough little lady. I'm glad I knew her and was able to help her at the end. I'm glad she's at peace now.

Comments

[skygiants]

May her memory be a blessing.

[sfred]

I'll hold you and her in the light.

[tricksters_queen]

I am so glad for your granny, and for you and your family, that she passed peacefully. ::hugs:: I understand the relief, too. I'm glad that you have so many memories of/with her to help to keep her close. Much love.

[out_there]

*hugs*

[corvidology]

All my best to you and yours. ♥

[silveradept]

We are sorry for your loss, even as we understand that there's going to be a little bit of relief that it's finished. I hope you get a lot of support in these times.