darchildre | (no subject)

An extremely goofy question:

So, imagine you are running a D&D campaign, where you started by running Lost Mines of Phandelver for a bunch of newbies and are about halfway done and will have to start doing original stuff soon. And imagine that your plan for original stuff has always involved the party being employed and based out of a magical library. And then imagine you spent 2+ months being really obnoxiously into Good Omens, so instead of having the library run by, I don't know, a wizard or something, you decided to make the person running the library not-actually-but-kind-of!Aziraphale. Which, of course, meant that somewhere in the magical library is not-actually-but-kind-of!Crowley, obviously.

(Which actually works out really nicely because you had tentatively planned for the Big Bad of the campaign to be a Star Spawn cult and now you have exciting mythology about the gods leaving the Prime Material Plane centuries ago Because of Reasons and now there are Outsider interlopers that the gods aren't terribly inclined to do anything about but some of their minor functionaries - who quite like the Prime Material plane - are and thus are recruiting adventurers.)

Anyway. So, not!Aziraphale and not!Crowley are actually a fairly powerful angel/demon but present themselves as fairly ordinary mortal folks. (Probably not very well.) Which means, imagine, that you have to figure out how they present themselves as mortal folks. Not!Aziraphale is pretty easy - probably human, definitely a Knowledge domain Cleric. Not!Crowley is clearly a yuan-ti but, given this very silly setup...

You guys, what the hell class is not!Crowley? Fiend-pact Warlock is much too on the nose, right?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I showed this to my daughter (who understands it, unlike me) and she opines "I think Crowley could be tiefling instead of a yuan-ti because that is the race for people who are gay, genderqueer, or however you think of Crowley."

Tieflings are very good, but, like, actual D&D snake-people! He's gonna be queer no matter what, so he might as well still have the eyes and the scales.

She's very pro-tiefling.*g*

Also suggests "bard for versatility. you can cover any weird shit you do if you're a bard".

That is an excellent point.

I agree that he should be a bard! (All his bard songs start to sound like Queen after a couple of verses ...)

It would be funny to see him as a warlock who spends a lot of time bullshitting his patron about exactly how much and what kind of evil he's done this week, though.

These are all great ideas :D

Yuan-ti for Crowley, of course. As for class, I think he would multiclass: started out fiend-pact warlock, added a level of bard early on, then a few levels rogue probably because being sneaky and stuff was kinda expected and he was still experimenting, then some more levels in bard because that suited him better and it was really useful for his job...

(Also, Aziraphale definitely took one level in wizard once, because he thinks arcane magic is fun.)

I feel that D&D is frequently very on-the-nose and thus fiend pact Warlock is perfect. He made a deal, but did not read the fine print and now he's Stuck.

Aziraphale could also be an aasimar, though human isn't a bad fit for him at all.

But yeah, Crowley as a bard would also fit, but there's really no reason not to be on-the-nose with D&D. About half the time players don't even fully figure out who you're basing NPCs on, and when they do they delight in knowing the reference and making accurate assumptions based on meta-knowledge.