Sep. 3rd, 2021

darchildre: rebis in a purple trenchcoat, looking enigmatic (rebis says:)
Every once in a while, I get an older female patron who comes up to the desk and says something like, "You look like you've lost weight!" I never have any idea what to do with that.

a) I don't own a scale and haven't weighed myself in at least 5 years. I am entirely uninterested in my weight.

b) However, all my clothes still fit the same way they always did and and the amount of food I eat (average, probably) and the amount of exercise I do (none) has remained constant. So probably not?

c) Is it a compliment? An expression of concern? What am I supposed to take away from you saying this?

d) While I'm not personally offended, in my view it is extremely rude to comment on another person's body like that - especially someone you don't actually know well - so my first instinct is to ignore their terrible faux pas and let them save face. This is probably not what they're looking for.

I usually end up saying something like "Not that I'm aware of" after a momentary pause for confusion, and then move on to asking how they are, but it always feels like I'm wrongfooting them.

Which they did to me first, though, so I don't feel particularly bad about it.

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darchildre: a candle in the dark.  text:  "a light in dark places". (Default)
Renfield

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