(no subject)

This post is about food and my weird feelings about food. If that sounds like something you don't want to read (which is cool), please scroll on by.

So, food. Is kinda the worst. I mean, I'm fine with eating and whatever, but it's all so tedious all the time - human beings have to pretty much be constantly thinking about acquiring food and preparing food and consuming food and cleaning up after food, and then you have to do it again. It's terrible. (Plus I have my added bonus problems of not enjoying a lot of foods because I'm a weirdo who doesn't like a lot of things - mushy things are terrible and most fruits don't taste good and I honestly don't understand most sauces, why would you do that to yourself? Food is already unpleasantly juicy a lot of the time - why would you make that problem worse?)

Basically, right now, I'm going through one of my exciting periods of "food is terrible, why do I have to do this?" where nothing is at all appealing and I sort of eat mechanically because I'm aware that my body needs fuel, but it's really not enjoyable. And we have not invented reliable food pills yet. I swear to god, when the cyborg revolution comes, I'm going to have my digestive system replaced with something I can just plug in overnight like a cell phone.*

The one time during the day I don't have these problems is breakfast. And that is because I have eaten the same breakfast nearly everyday (barring breakfasts eaten away from from home) since I was 13: a toasted bagel with cheese and a cup of tea. It's enjoyable when I'm okay with eating and inoffensive when I'm not, the process of making it is pleasingly ritualized at this point, and I don't have to think about it. So today I thought, how can I extend that method out to other meals? Dinner can't be the same thing every night, because I eat it with other people, but I stress a lot about lunch, which I eat alone, and I'd rather not.

So today, I am beginning an experiment. It involves smoothies. Today, I am going to start making some kind of vanilla-almond** green smoothie and, by continued experimentation, I will eventually develop a smoothie that a) tastes inoffensive, b) is reasonably healthy, c) is filling enough to serve as a meal, and d) I can make without thinking about it. And then I will have that for days when food sounds like a terrible idea.

It's not a food pill, but I suppose it will do.





*I will also have my eyes upgraded and my reproductive system entirely removed.

**Vanilla and almond are among the least offensive flavors of things for me. Also, it's easy to get vanilla yogurt and I have almond butter already.

(no subject)

Tonight, my parents and I went out to dinner. We were sitting in a booth in our local Mexican restaurant, had just ordered, and were chatting pleasantly when some guy walks past our booth from the bar area and straight out dumps a beer on my dad. And then just high-tailed it out the door. I don't mean the asshole tripped - no, he walked up to the booth, threw the beer at my dad, and then kept walking out of the restaurant without breaking stride.

It was the single most mindboggling thing I've ever witnessed.

After a stunned moment, my dad followed the guy out to the parking lot and yelled, "What the hell was that, asshole?", loudly enough that my mom followed him out to make sure things didn't escalate. (I should perhaps note that my dad almost never curses.) And the fucker just shrugged and left.

It's just baffling. Mostly because it was so random. I mean, most of the bullying or general fuckery I've seen in my life has had a reason behind it - a fucked up reason, obviously, but a reason. But no - this dumbass just wanted to throw beer at someone and my dad happened to be there.

What the hell is wrong with some people?